I heard this line a few days ago.  We tend to make the things that happen to use the things that define our identity.  If something happens to you, it might have a deep impact on your life and identity, but the things that happen to you is not your life.

It is just a shadow.  Sometimes the shadow is tall, and sometimes it’s long.  But your shadow is not you.  You cast the shadow.  Your life is not what happens to you.  It’s a part of your life, but it’s not your life.